I've Been Here All Along

In 2011, I was given the opportunity to be a DEI Program Manager. Not because I wasn’t qualified—I was perfectly qualified. I had the drive, the motivation, and the skills to do excellent work. And I did. Above and beyond. To the point where I was recognized and asked to sit on boards, a governor’s task force, and various panels. I’ve facilitated hundreds of groups and reached thousands of people over the years. I’ve been honored and asked to give keynote speeches in front of students and even at the MN State Capitol.

I’ve worked 60 to 80-hour weeks. Pursued degrees, certificates, and continued my education relentlessly. But the truth is—I did all of this not just for growth or passion. I did it to prove that I was qualified. More than qualified. I had to be exceptional because, for people like me, being “good enough” never is enough.

And here’s the thing—sometimes, I was bored. When you’re overqualified, that happens. And when boredom creeps in, motivation can wane. Eventually, exhaustion caught up with me. I stopped going above and beyond because I was tired. But here’s the kicker—when you’re a masc-presenting, queer person of color, simply being tired gets translated as being mediocre in the eyes of others.

I used to say, “My mediocre is better than some people’s best work.” And it’s true. But the world isn’t soft for people like me. The constant pressure to be excellent, interesting, charming, pleasant, and humble in a world that’s always trying to crush you—it’s oppressive. It wears you down.

I’ve said this over and over: If there are two candidates with the same qualifications, before DEI, the less qualified white man would often get hired over a qualified white woman or person of color.

THAT is why we have DEI.

Not to give anyone an unfair advantage—but to correct an imbalance that’s been there all along. To create space where people don’t have to be exceptional just to be seen as enough.

#DEI #Equity #Inclusion #RepresentationMatters #PersonalReflection

📸 Me in a brown coat holding my phone.

"If you find me not within you, you will never find me. For I have been with you, from the beginning of me." —Rumi