Lent 2025 Day 13: Holding Onto Friendship, Justice, and Hope

Flannel Diaries
Mar 19
3 min read

“Learn to do right; seek justice. Defend the oppressed. Take up the cause of the fatherless; plead the case of the widow.” – Isaiah 1:17

I've been missing my friend Kimi in California. We usually talk on the phone—she’s one of the few people who refuses to go back and forth on text. We’ve known each other for 25 years. That means she’s seen every version of me, from my mid-20s to now. She knows my flaws, my strengths, my stubbornness, and my growth. And she’s still here. That means something.

We’ve had adventures, laughs, and probably a few moments where we drove each other nuts. She could tell you all the ways I’ve changed since I was 25. But the truth is, having someone in your life for that long is a rare and beautiful thing.

We Can’t Go Back to “Normal”

Yes, we are underreacting to what’s happening politically and socially. Mass layoffs of federal workers. Funding slashed from essential government agencies. Court orders dismissed. Rights dismantled. The very foundation of democracy shaking. We are not going back to “normal.” And we shouldn’t. Because normal is what led us here. Normal was broken. History has taught us that destruction happens in moments, while justice takes generations to build. The only way forward is through. We have to learn. We have to be better. We have to refuse to look away.

There’s a quote often attributed to Martin Niemöller, a Lutheran pastor who once sympathized with Nazi ideology but later became one of its fiercest critics. He spent eight years imprisoned in Nazi concentration camps for speaking out. His most famous words:

“First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out—because I was not a socialist...Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.”

The lesson is clear. Why do we wait until they come for us before we care? Why do we stand by while the most marginalized are under attack, comfortably relieved that it isn’t us—yet? That’s what haunts me the most. When I joke, "They’re coming for me," will my friends only start caring then? Will they only realize it was never a joke when it’s too late?

I mask my fear with humor. But the fear is real.

Still, I can’t stop living my life because of fear. I never have, and I never will.

I don’t stand up for marginalized people because I think it will protect me. I do it because it’s the right thing to do. And I won’t wait until they come for me. Because I already know they will.

Winning on Different Terms

For some reason, this made me think about an old Tom Hanks movie, "The Man with One Red Shoe." It’s an 80s comedy built on mistaken identities, deception, and absurdity. A practical joke, a misunderstanding, and suddenly, chaos unfolds. It reminds me of another film I love—Knives Out. In both, those who play by the rules of deception always lose. The only ones who win are the ones who weren’t even playing the game. It makes me wonder: Why are we still playing by the rules of people who keep changing them to maintain their power?

Maybe the only way to win is to stop playing their game altogether. Maybe we don’t win by being better players—we win by being better people.

Because in the end, the only thing that truly matters is how we treat each other.